down with love sounds like the answer

ok, so ATLAST i broke-up with the guy. it was a struggle, because he really didn't want to, and i ended up not replying any of his texts. i know it's mean, but honestly, man, get a life. oh well :)

so now, what's next? not sure. the horrible thing is actually that i have a feeling that i'm still in-like with some of my ex'es. "shoot" i tell my self. because the best bf's ever, i have let them go. so for them to be replaced. yea.. hard. and now, all i can do is act like i'm down with love, when i'm actually, so so not! wonder what i will do? could i keep this costume on? or am i going to burst out, and let my face fall on the ground? damn. this is hard.

yet, while all that love thinking is going on, i still have my exams going on. i'm doing so much better than i did. it's not the best i can do, but atleast i'm going up-up-up, right? well just wish me luck that i can juggle all this about

boy talk

ok, i guess i'm stuck with this guy that i'm not a fan about. and i don't know how to say to him "sorry, you're not the guy" in indonesian and yet a nice way. cause as a friend, he's ok, but as more, UUH! no thank you baby. so i'm not sure when i'll break it to him, but when i do, i'll update you

and to make things worse, i like another guy, since..... FOREVER! i knew this guy for a while now. and firstly, i thought he was a pretty face, then as i got to know him, he was one of the funniest guy ever! he could beat me from being me, it was impressive. and you could say we became close and started to admit things to eachother. we always thought we would end-up being together, and now..... we're no where. he always blames me because i have some friends that are boys. and i blame him because he is secretly dating (he's a womanizer, as you can say). now.... i'm falling hard for him again. why? is he really the one i like? or is he just a pretty face that i adore?? oh god, help

regrets.

well these days i've been seeing so many people doing what they love to do. and damn it, i want that! it's been such a long time i took extra classes that i love and passionate about. those things that i saw was : javajazz, acoustic night, yusuf obelet and so many more (if you don't know what they are, there all music concerts and they weren't being paid to do it. they do it because they love to)

the last time i did extra classes that i was passionate about was around 2 year ago ? it was hip-hop class. god, i miss that. and maybe guitar lessons ? (but my dad was a better teacher than the stinkin teacher was). but now, all i want is to do is do dance lessons and vocal lessons. (i'm not good in singing, but it's so much fun) as i have learned that hip-hop dancing, is crapping hard!! i'm going to take jazz lessons instead. it's so cool ! and maybe rather than vocal lessons, maybe a band? hahaha, dreaming a little high here

oh well, what ever i choose, i just don't want to have this feeling again next year. i just wish this year will end out great and i wouldn't regret anything, again.